Toddler Temper Tantrums
If you have ever been in a grocery store or other public place when a toddler lets loose, you now just how distracting and obnoxious it can be.
If the child is your own, it becomes even more excruciating and embarrassing.
However, with the right tools, you can get toddler temper tantrums under control before they drive you nuts.
Consistency is the cardinal rule of child discipline.
Children naturally want to test the boundaries of their parents guidance. If you react differently to the same situation, they become confused and continue to escalate the incidence of toddler temper tantrums.
It can be extremely tempting to cave in to them in order to get a little peace and quiet. However, for your sanity and their safety and development, it is much better to draw a hard line for unacceptable behavior.
While it is more difficult at first, better long term behavior is the inevitable result.
Most parents who insist that they have tried a proven parenting technique and it hasn’t worked for them have neglected to pay attention to consistency.
Change the Environment
Most toddler temper tantrums are caused by a specific item, situation or point of conflict between the parent and toddler.
Removing your toddler from the environment that is causing the issue can help to de-escalate the tantrum. If you are in the middle of shopping or a social outing, this can be frustrating.
However, like all aspects of parenting, discipline is an investment that will pay back dividends later.
If you have a huge problem with tantrums, schedule only short outings until you both get the situation a little better under control.
It can also be helpful to anticipate a troublesome situation and eliminate it beforehand.
Use Time Outs Effectively
With so much research indicating that spanking is harmful to your toddler, time outs have become the discipline method of choice.
However, they are actually often misunderstood and misused.
The biggest thing to remember with toddlers is that they like to see a big splash when they misbehave. In other words, your reaction is the most important pay off that toddler temper tantrums bring to your child.
Take away the pay off. The most effective time out is given without a lot of dialogue and interaction between parent and child.
Explain the rules in a simple, understandable way. If your child gets out of their time out spot (and they will!), place them back in firmly, showing as little emotion as possible.
After the time has been served, you can give hugs and discuss why the behavior was unacceptable.
After a week or two, they will have the drill down and it will be much easier.
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Facts You MUST Understand if you are Ever Going to Effectively Deal with the Terrible Twos or Children Behavior Problems
Behavior is driven by Emotion,
NOT Logic. This is fundamental to everything, including understanding toddler behavior. Behavior, for any person of any age, is determined by their emotional state. People ACT from their emotions, and they later JUSTIFY their actions with logic. But small kids don’t have the ability to use logic, so they act purely from emotion. Keep this in mind when dealing with behavior in toddlers.
We tend to overuse the word “No” when we talk to our kids.
This causes problems with toddler behavior. You remember the story of the boy who cried wolf, right? The little shepherd boy was bored while watching the sheep so he decided to cry wolf and make the villagers come running. Before long, they stopped responding to his false cries. When a parent cries “No” at every little thing, kids stop listening. The parent’s cries fade into the background. Behavior problems in children can stem from this caveat. I’ll teach you multiple ways to get what you want without screaming “NO” at your child – and it simply works better!
If you want to have any chance at all of influencing your toddler’s behavior, you MUST have rapport first.
Rapport simply means having an emotional connection to another person. I’ll show you how you can learn LOTS of ways to create this crucial emotional bridge before you deal with children behavior problems.
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